Discover your own powers. What floods you with joy?
-Sandra Cisneros

Monday, July 21, 2014

Viva Aguascalientes'n! - Top 10 places to visit

Aguascalientes, AGS is located in central Mexico and is mostly known for its cock fights, la famosa Feria de San Marcos, and it's warm residents also known as Hidrocalidos.   

Having married an hidrocalido, I have come to know and love this city.  My husband is living in Aguascalientes while we adjust his immigration status so that he can legally return to the U.S. During this time, I have discovered the great degree of resilience and strength that our partnership is made of as I resume our life, without him, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin which is where we once called home.  Earlier in my blog, I wrote about our lives being a lot like a tale of two cities. This is our current reality due to the broken immigration system that separates families not just through devastating deportations, but also through processes like mine; we are one of thousands of couples that have to endure separations that are not on our terms, but on those of a failed system.  Making the best out of a bad situation, I travel to Aguascalientes as much as I can. This blog reflects my top 10 places in Aguas, where Miguel and I have created memories, laughed, reflected, cried, and dreamt of better days.  The following are places I wholeheartedly recommend if you ever find yourself in the beautiful city of Aguascalientes. 




















1. Cerro del Picacho - Also known as "El cerro del muerto," this is the place to visit if you are into hiking! Rated by the National Geographic as one of the top 10 places to watch a sunset, this place is a true gem.  You can see it from many parts of the city where it appears as the silhouette of a man laying on his back.  As you can see, my husband Miguel is quite the adventurous photographer!  The above picture was taken when we hiked to the feet (one end of the vast hill).  If you walk more toward the middle you can find a waterfall certain times of the year.

















2. Birria del Mercado Juarez - Goat meat is quite the delicacy in Aguascalientes, and this place is where the locals go to get the best of it! Located downtown, this mercado has the best birria that I have tasted in the 10 different Mexican states where Miguel and I have ventured!




















3. Jardin de San Marcos - This a staple in the city, a very typical place to take a stroll with family, and ideal if you are with your significant other.  During the "Feria de San Marcos," one the largest festivals in the country, this garden is decorated with the theme of the year.  My husband's fondest memory is when he was 7 years old, young women would go around the plaza and young men would court them by wrapping them in "Serpentinas" or give them a rose if they wanted to ask for a date.  His role in all of this was to stand behind bushes and throw eggs at the young couples...
























4. Restaurante La Saturnina - one of the oldest restaurant in the city of Aguascalientes, where Miguel and I had our wedding day brunch, and where my father in law had his first job; La Saturnina is a special place for our family.  Besides my personal reasons, this place has delicious food, a lunch buffet and is located on a street with a lot of great shops and museums. 
























5. Museo de la Muerte - In Mexican culture (and several other Latin American countries), death is perceived quite differently than in the United States.  Death is inevitable and this museum takes you through the different ways this reality is displayed in Mexican culture.  It was neat to learn about the origins of the traditions and see local artwork that tells stories of Mexicans and their encounters with La Calaca. This museum is free, fun and across the street from El Parian.
























6. Parque Ecologico Heroes Mexicanos - This is a place that you should plan to visit for a few hours.  A popular location for field trips, El Parque Heroes has a lot to offer.  From the beautiful gardens, paddle boating, tandem bike riding, La Casa de Juan Chavez, and the mini city of Aguascalientes, this park is very fun!  A great activity for those with children but also for us big kids :) 




















7. El Ocote - A municipality just outside of the city, El Ocote is a place of wonders.  The beautiful lagoon and the Pinturas Rupestres (pre-historic prints) draw people to come and explore in the stories left by our ancestors.





8. Expoplaza - For those that know me, you know I like to party! So this is the place that Miguel and I visit most Friday and Saturday nights when I'm in Aguascalientes.  During the day there are shops, restaurants and a movie theatre that you could check out.  At night there are bars, and clubs all along the strip.  During La Feria de San Marcos, this place is packed all day and night with special concerts, tamboras, and hundreds of Mexican artifacts.  Another neat thing about the Plaza is that you can see the Torero pop out of the clock on the hour every hour!
















9. Isla de San Marcos - A place to visit only during the time of La Feria de San Marcos.  They have livestock, restaurants, music, and even a little zip line! A very fun place visit during the day and some evenings when there are concerts.













10. Yolihuani Temazcales - A temazcal is a type of sweat lodge which originated with pre-Hispanic Indigenous populations.  The word temazcal comes from the Nahuatl word temazcalli which means house of heat, and in Aguascalientes the Yolihuani Temazcales spa is definitely a place to visit! Affordable, away from the loud and busy city- this is where you go if you need to relax.  Their mud baths are the best!


Sunday, March 30, 2014

Los Flores





I have never had much of a relationship with my dad; circumstances in my life have kept a physical distance between us, but I always knew he was there for me.  I've come to realize that the bond you have with your siblings is one unlike any other.  I grew up with my sister Liz and she is my best friend and the love I have for her can't really be described through words. A few months ago I met some of my siblings for the first time although I had known about them for several years. They were warm, friendly and a lot like me!  I can count on one hand the times that I have felt what I felt that day; an overwhelming joy that tugged at my core and made me feel so blessed.  I went to Union Station making my way from La Placita Olvera nervous and excited I walked in and there they were, Linda, Bianca, Oscar, Ricky, Jesse and Angel- my siblings who have my same last name, facial features and blood.  I finally met the people that I had been building up in my mind; years of wondering what they looked like, what music they like, what their dreams are and if they were anything like me. 


They exceeded my expectations.

We had a wonderful time during my visit.  I got a chance that many people don't get; to reconnect with family and the opportunity to build on these newly discovered relationships.  I hope that one day our children can meet, play and know each other as they grow.  For now, I am happy with having met them, and I look forward to our evolving relationships. 



The Fishing Village of Popotla, Baja California, Mexico

Our view from the seafood restaurant where we had 'mojarras' for lunch.

Some 'pescadores' coming back to shore after fishing all morning.

The seagulls and other birds flocking the shore.

With the one and only enjoying the warm sun and cool January breeze.

Mr. Churro as we called him, making us some of Popotla's finest pastries.
 
In January of 2014 we took a day trip to Popotla- a fishing village in Baja California.  We had heard from the locals in Rosarito that this village was the best place to go for fresh seafood.  As we waited for the 'convi' a van that transported locals to nearby towns Miguel and I made friends with a Mexican man who was dressed in Tejano attire, a handsome and tall man with a mustache who smiled easily. He talked to us about how enchanting Popotla was and told us that we needed to do three things once we got there; eat some seafood, visit Baja studios and walk along the shore. Miguel and I had heard of the shore and the seafood from other locals but nothing about Baja Studios.  The well dressed man told us that once upon a time Baja Studios held tours for the general public but that he didn't think they did this anymore.  He went on to say that this place was special because that is where they filmed an open water scene for the movie Titanic- the one where everyone is frantic in the Atlantic Ocean just after the Titanic went under.  Miguel and I were immediately intrigued, how much did they pay the locals? Was it in filmed in the Popotla shores? How many people were a part of it? The man answered us with this; "Se vendieron por un lonche, solamente les dieron una torta y la gente se avento al agua," they were sold with lunch, it only took a sandwich for people to get in the water.
 
The ride from Rosarito into Popotla was short and quite bumpy but it was nice to get a glimpse of the life of the locals as they were going to or coming from work, selling candy, and picking up their children from school. When we got there the smell of fresh fish, the sound of the ocean shore, vendors selling anything from seashell necklaces to shark meat were hovering us and other tourists just as we arrived. Then we saw a familiar face, the well dressed man from the 'convi' stop was there and he was part of a band that was playing on the shore, where families that were there (many from Tijuana or Southern California) paid them to play some traditional Mexican songs. We smiled and he nodded his head. We felt welcomed, and then proceeded to spend the day eating seafood, shopping and taking pictures with locals.  We would love to visit again with more friends/family and just spend the day at the beach, but not in January, perhaps in the summer!  

Monday, January 20, 2014

Social media: connecting or disconnecting us?



Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, LinkedIn, Tumblr, Pinterest, Foursquare, Vine, and Skype- these are the different places on the web where you can follow, like, tweet or see pictures of what I've been doing, where I've been, and who I've been on these adventures with...kinda creepy, right? 

Most of us started with one social media 'profile' and then hoped on the next bandwagon. Then some of us got fancy and decided to categorize how or with whom we shared certain parts of our life, added filters, learned to edit videos and pinned things. 

But WHY!? 

Well because we wanted to 'stay connected' with friends from our hometown, from college, our relatives, ex co-workers or friends that live across the country or world...but then what happened? 

Social media began to disconnect some of us. 

Have you ever been around a group of people who were on their phones almost the entire time? Checking into the restaurant, taking a picture of their food, tweeting about how great it was.


I asked my husband, who is only on 2 of the above mentioned social media networks what he thought about social media based on his and his friends experiences with it; is it connecting or disconnecting us? This was his response; "I think it's great, but I definitely think that some people are letting it run their lives- it disconnects people who let it. In terms of creating drama among couples; those relationships were probably weak to begin with."

So what's the moral of the story? Everything in moderation. The tricky thing is that social media is so integrated into the fabric of our present day society that we don't even think about the amount of time we spend on it. 

Moderation is different for everybody.  If more than one of your loved ones talks to you about your excessive use of social media, you need to check yourself.  If you are reprimanded at work, your marriage or relationship is suffering from it, take some time off- get reconnected with the living breathing human beings in your life, pick up a book, go out for a run-clear your head! We now have this idea that we have to share so many aspects of our lives, but we don't.  

Next time you meet up with  a friend try this;  Look them in the the eye, listen to what they are saying, savor your food, carpe diem people! Yes it is nice to have videos and pictures to remember our vacations, and other experiences, but there is no price for living in the present.

So yes go ahead and document your life, be aware of the next new thing but also remember that seizing life as it comes is what makes remembering those moments [we are so anxious to document] worth it. 


Tuesday, December 3, 2013

45 LIFE LESSONS - WRITTEN BY A 90 YEAR OLD

"Life is short: Kiss slowly, Laugh loudly, Love intensely, and Forgive quickly"
Truth be told I pretty much live on a variety of social media networks.  We read a bunch of articles, see a lot of pictures, videos, quotes, and are asked to forward/share/like/RT a million things, right?  I almost never do...almost.  

This post really made me slow down, put down my beat up iPhone and use it for something other than to share (yet another) cat video.  I called my husband to tell him how much I love him.  Most of the stuff on this blog is mine, but this I borrowed to share with you; and I hope you like it as much as I did.  

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short not to enjoy it.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.
5. Don’t buy stuff you don’t need.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for things that matter.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye… But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful. Clutter weighs you down in many ways.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to be happy. But it’s all up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words, ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose Life.
28. Forgive but don’t forget.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give Time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d
grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. Accept what you already have, not what you think you need.
42. The best is yet to come…
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.

45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.

Murder Mystery Party: a la Nancy



Turning a quarter century is no joke.  I was pretty bummed out about turning 25 because this meant that I had to come up with a new 5 year plan.  Let's be real people, ain't nobody got time to start thinking about 30!

My awesome friend Sarah saw that I was not in the highest of spirits and several German beers and pretzels later a brilliant idea was born: Why don't you have a murder mystery party!? 

Alas, the adventure began and we looked online for ideas but none seemed to fit what we had in mind. I wanted to have characters that would suit the personalities of my friends, be diverse and have a plot that they could have a lot of fun with, so we thought to create our own.  

The party was a success! So I thought, why not share the joy for FREE!? 

Below you will find the 'Nancy and Sarah Murder Mystery Party Toolkit.'

Questions or feedback? Comment on this post!



PLOT
---

It’s a cold and windy November night and several friends from all walks of life come together to celebrate Zoe’s 25th birthday. The group is mostly from the East coast and a few from the Midwest- most from affluent families. While all the people present have connections with each other, they soon discover an anomaly when one of their friends goes missing. [More developments on this will arise at the party]. Your job is to come in full masquerade (i.e. wear a mask) and formal attire; assume everyone is a suspect when the murder is announced and until the murderer is found and the mystery is solved. Make sure to think about your character before the party, who you are and how to best portray your character’s personality: try not to break character and have fun with it! Come ready to drink, eat and solve a mystery!

CHARACTERS
---
Victim – George Selker 32, journalist at public press, big sports fan, gambling problem, very attractive, drinker,  > love triangle -How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) –grew up together in Lake Grove, Maine. [NOTE: HE NEVER ACTUALLY SHOWS UP TO THE PARTY]

Samantha Rodriguez- part time lover full time friend
Grew up with George [and others from Lake Grove] but started messing around with him 1 year ago, realized she didn’t want to marry Matias but couldn’t tell him because her parents would disown her.  She has a fixed marriage to keep the money.

Matias Thompson - Boyfriend of Samantha very rich and jerky   
Knows he has an arranged engagement.  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl)  - engaged to Samantha who grew up with Zoe in Lake Grove, Maine.

Sasha James- Samantha’s best friend, is a lawyer, mellow personality who grew up with Samantha and George. How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – grew up with her in Lake Grove, Maine.

Victoria Jones – Editor of the Newspaper “Public Press” is George’s boss, really can’t stand Harold or David.  She is very outspoken and a bit of a control freak and a workaholic- always checking emails in the middle of conversations, etc.  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – Cousins with Zoe.

Vanessa Selker – George’s sister 28 year old party girl aka HOT MESS. How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – very good friends with Zoe, went to college together and interned at the public press for a month and got fired for sleeping with Victoria’s love interest.  Is a waitress at Tango on and off.

Harold White - Busy body neighbor of Matias who is super conservative loves Fox news.  He is always calling George at the Public press with “tips” and writing letters to the editor.  He is very opinionated but not very reliable source.  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – was invited by Matias [whose girlfriend Samantha grew up with Zoe] at a golf game. 

Zoe Garcia (Birthday Girl) – Owns tapas restaurant called Tango, Victoria’s cousin and very good friends with Vanessa and knows most of the gang.

Tabitha Allen - How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) - Zoe’s friend from college former flame of George.  Book Worm – librarian at the university of Maine.

Bernard Allen – Tabitha’s husband who is a bus driver- is pretty quiet but a drunk and really hates George.  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl)- through Tabitha.

Gwen Zapata – George’s cousin and the one who does everything for everyone else.  Recently moved to the area and wants to get to know everyone.  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) –invited by George and has met Zoe at Tango.

David Chang- friends with Harold and also local alderman, How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – knows Matias through Harold, plays golf with Matias who invited them to the party. 

Tyriq Mendez – bartender at Tango restaurant and close friend of Zoe’s.  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) works at Zoe’s restaurant.

Cori Cohen – New Chef at Tango How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – Works at Zoe’s restaurant Tango.

Jose Cortez – Tyriq’s cousin, is a bookie, takes bets at Tangos bar.  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – hangs out at Tango a lot.

Rebecca Goldberg – accountant of George and David who is embezzling county money.  She is covering up the embezzling because she is getting a pay cut.  – (use info for clues.)  How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – Also went to college with Zoe.  Eats at Tango a lot.

Maria Berkowski  - ex flame (stalker) of George, she was the love of his life 7 years ago, cheated on him.  Later wanted him back by any means necessary.  Sister of Tyriq who is the bartender at Tango.  -How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) –Her brother works at Zoes resturant – was invited by Tyriq.

Marsha Xi – new girlfriend of David Chang; very outgoing, has a very unique laugh.   How they know Zoe (Birthday Girl) – Invited by David Chang who plays golf with Matias who is the FiancĂ©e of Samantha.

Karl Rogers- Maria’s date.  Doesn’t really know a lot of people but then runs into David Chang who he went to high school with. You are very outgoing and train for local and national build competitions.  You are also a private detective and a former cop.  You used to work for the show called Cheaters and that’s how you met Maria- when she was stalking George.

Venecio Lara- From El Salvador, lives in London, long time friends with Dexter (artist from El Salvador who will also be at party) and plays in a band called “auditory rape” and they just wrapped up their tour in Western Europe. He is Antoinette’s boyfriend.

Antoinette Abbey – Met Zoe during a study abroad trip and has kept in touch and is in town because her youngest brother is getting a married to a woman from Connecticut.  You have a British accent, are a writer and teach guitar at a small university in London.

Dexter White- Hotel Manager at the Hilton and a family friend of Elizabeth and Antoinette.  Dexter is from El Salvador but has been living in London for 4 years and is an artist, which is why he moved to London but works at the hotel as a day job. 

Elizabeth Abbey- Antoinette’s younger sister.  You are in town because your youngest brother is getting a married to a woman from Connecticut. You have a British accent and your sister Antoinette knows the birthday girl but you don’t know anyone. You are a former hippie and own a small jewelry design company.

Paulina Cuellar- You are the wife of Jacob and you come from a very wealthy family from Boston (your father was a chemist).  You are quite the socialite and know Zoe since you and Jacob eat at her restaurant frequently.  You speak 3 languages and your mother is from Colombia and your father is from Germany. 

Jacob Cuellar - You are a small business owner that owns a chain of autoshops in the area.  You are a long time friend of David Chang and donated money to get him elected as alderman; and he is the one that invited you to the party.  You also know Zoe because you have worked on her car and some others at the party are also familiar faces whose car you’ve worked on.

Murder scenarios
---
(Choose whichever one you want: we chose the one in bold and the clues below are according to this particular murder scenario)

Scenario 1 – Matias – weapon – knife, reason – love triangle “Jealous Lover”

Scenario 2 – Jose –weapon – gun, reason – owed him money “Gambling Money debt”

Scenario 3 – David – looks like a suicide (SLIT WRISTS) – KNIFE, reason – found out about embezzling “corruption” 

Scenario 4 – Marina – Weapon –poison, reason – accidental was trying to knock him out “stalkerly love”. 

How the night will pan out/ CLUES
 ---

CLUE 1- *Harold* You just called the Public Press to ask about your letter to the editor; wondering if it will be published.  An intern answers the phone and puts you on hold while he looks for George Selker, the only reporter still at the office- he comes back on the phone within 30 seconds and he screams into the phone…”He’s dead!!!!” You are able to surmise from the intern’s distraught banter that it seems like a suicide since his writs have been slit.  [You proceed to tell people at the party that: George…he’s dead!]

CLUE 2- *Karl* As soon as the murder is announced you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. Hint: look to the right of the toilet.  You find a bloody knife.  It dawns on you that almost everyone at this party knows George and that it doesn’t sound like he would kill himself based on the nice things mostly everyone has said and your experience having investigated him before- being a detective you take the knife, put it in a Ziploc bag, reveal your badge and announce, “I don’t think that was a suicide I just found some vital evidence leading me to believe that the murder is among us” No one can leave until we solve who the murderer is.

The accusing begins [people who are accused give their alibis]

CLUE 3 – Victoria Editor for public press checks her email finds that she had an email from George earlier that evening.  He tells her that he is working on a big story having to do with Embezzling in the local government.  – He does not want reveal his source in an email.  The tone of the email seemed a little scared; he said he was afraid someone might be following him. [You reveal this Email to the group and accuse Harold since he discovered him and would always annoy him]   

CLUE 4 – Rebecca steps in after Victoria begins accusing Harold- “alright alright, If I come clean I demand protection and you are all my witnesses here tonight! I believe that it’s true, George was on the brink of a story that was going to put him on the national radar.  Begins crying… David, please don’t make me do this! [Cue to turn to David and then he begins speaking]


David reveals why he did it and gets arrested/ escorted out

HOW THE MURDER HAPPENED
--- 
George was about to make his break with a story he was working on for the newspaper.  He was doing a story on the local alderman David Chang who was close friends with his nosy neighbor Harold.   After an interesting conversation with Harold he started to realize there was something fishy going on in the local offices.   After some digging, Rebecca, David’s accountant, started to catch on that George was digging up dirt.  Rebecca conspires with David to hide his embezzling in the city and personal books.  She tells David about her suspicions that he is digging up dirt to write a story that would end his political career.  Rebecca assumed David would just talk to George or threaten him.  Instead, David decides to kill George and make it look like a suicide. 

A Tale of Two Cities


(Photo credit: Miguel Angel Lopez, taken in San Luis PotosĂ­, Mexico 2013)

Las ciudades...

Milwaukee, Wisconsin - United States

Aguascalientes, Ags. - Mexico 

1,918 miles

Have you ever wished you could be in two places at the same time? I have; everyday for the past two years.  Currently my life is a tale of two cities except that there's no London, no Paris, and no revolution. 

He came to the United States when he was 19 with a lot of hopes, one backpack, and in search of the infamous American Dream.  He found what he came for, economic opportunity and then found aspirations to do even more in life.  

Then he met her. 

She knew that he was someone that would change her life.  What makes Miguel different than anyone else is that he has many top secrets and has told me 99% of them.  He is hardworking, gorgeous, and an inspiration to me and anyone who meets him.  

Adjusting his immigration status has been a long journey that we knew would be long because when he left we weren't even married or started any process- nearly a year after he was in Mexico is when we started his process and it has made me realize several things.  I am an American citizen that has to put up with the repercussions of a broken immigration system that criminalizes individuals who are left with few options in order to survive.  I never thought I'd be going through this and it really makes me value the privileges that I have; yet, at moments I've become angry at the circumstance, at our inadequate government and have really come to loathe the question, "Doesn't he just get his green card if he married you?" This experience has brought us closer, further, and then closer again.  On this journey I have learned three things: 

I have truly married my best friend. 

The best way to channel your anger toward the machine is to organize. 

There is a light at the end of the tunnel.